Tag Archive | christianity

Waiting

 

I have never been one that has been very good at waiting and patience has never been my strong suit. I know the Lord has been trying to grow me in this area and I find it a very painful place and some days are better than others. I have been battling with poor health for the last five years and for the most part I just roll with it but lately I have been feeling like I have had enough. After enduring a year’s worth of operations and being kidney stone free for a year my body is now making them again I just passed one and I am bleeding again and trying to pass another. My Chron’s disease is very active and the pain, cramps and lack of bowel control has made me take a leave of absence from work. My much-anticipated appointment with an internalist turned out to be a waste of time as he offered no help, no new medication just a see you in 3 months. I have an MRI this Thurs but I doubt this will shed much light on all the pain that has been ripping through my body and I guess the internalist thinks the same thing or he would not have said see you in three months. Now we are trying to sell the farm and we are having lots of showings but no offers and it just adds to the stress because we have a conditional offer on a house that ends Sept 15th. I know we are to wait on the Lord and His timing is often not when we think it should occur. But once again I find myself frustrated with the turn of events because I am trying to do the right thing. If we can sell the farm we can pay off the mortgage and all our debts and have just one small mortgage fee. We want to live a Godly life free of debt and I guess because we are trying to do the right thing I thought it would be a fast sell because God would bless it. I guess you more seasoned Christians are laughing at me now . I know God can’t be rushed so I am trying to look at the situation in a different light instead of seeing the situation as one that I am waiting on I could also look at in the light that the Lord is giving me the opportunity to trust Him and when I look at it in that light it feels much better than simply waiting on Him. The listing on the house runs out in sixty days which would be Sept 30th and if it hasn’t sold by then we will take it off the market and wait for spring.  Than I will just have to trust that the Lord doesn’t want us to make a move until next spring  so we will have to wait and see.

 

Ironically waiting is not a strong suit of my Service Dog and it has been developed over time with repeated opportunities to wait and rewards for waiting . I guess the Lord has not finished training me yet lol.

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I Will Follow You

Evening Devotion

Psalm 37:vs 4-6

Delight yourself in the Lord

And He shall give you the desires of your heart

Commit your way  to the Lord

Trust also in Him

And he shall bring it to pass

He shall bring forth your righteousness as the light

And justice as the noonday

I Will Follow You

Lord You have convinced me, that I need to start again

Taking all the lessons learned, I will follow You my friend

You never have abandoned  me, You caught my every tear

And when I thought the end was near, you whispered child please don’t fear

For you are still my daughter no matter what you do and say

I’ve written my name upon your heart and there it will always stay

Regardless of your performance I didn’t come to judge

I want just to love you, I never hold a grudge

So let go of your anger, let not bitterness take hold

And I will restore you to my church, I’ll return you to the fold

There will still be trials but the holy spirit will be there

For you felt my holy breath ,in the rushing of the wind I brought to bear

Now that you trust me I can help you build a better life

Full of  my goodness I will lead you to the light

I will fight your battles I will be your sight

And all that you’ve been through, I will use it all

To help you minister to others  no matter what their  port of call

Keep your heart wide open, full of compassion for the broken

And I will bring to pass a life full of joy, for you’re the one I ‘ve chosen

When my heart is overwhelmed

541When my heart is overwhelmed the Lord has been gracious to me. Even though my health has not been good and my looks have gone I have not been abandon. The Lord has stayed by my side to comfort me.

Currently I am just getting over pneumonia and hoping my breathing will come back in time. Despite the let downs I have had over the last five years  health wise the Lord has blessed me more than I deserve . He has given me a husband who loves me like the Lord loves the Church and I am so grateful for that gift. No matter how bad I look my wonderful husband tell me everyday that he thinks I am beautiful and how much he loves me.

The Lord has also blessed me with my Service Dog in training Riley who is such a big help to me. She is such a cuddle bug and she loves to hug. She will wrap her big hairy paws around my waist lay her head on my shoulder and just hold on to me. Everytime she does this I think to myself this is a little slice of heaven that the Lord left on Earth.

Thank You Lord for your Gifts!

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Drown Proofing

Definition of Drown Proofing :a survival technique, for swimmers or nonswimmers, in which the body is allowed to float vertically in the water, with the head submerged, the lungs filled with air, and the arms and legs relaxed, the head being raised to breathe every ten seconds or so. Origin of drownproofing Expand

Drown Proofing with God

I slowly sink

He lifts me up

I slowly sink

He lifts me up

I slowly sink

He lifts me up

Isaiah 66:13

As a mother comforts her child,

 So I will comfort you

Just keep swimming but let God be your Life Saver

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Morning Devotion

I have had the biopsy procedure done last Friday and it will be three weeks untill I get the results. Pressure that comes with my job has taken a lot of my energy away as I worry about the future. Something we are not supposed to do because our heavenly father always looks out for us and knows what we need. Still sometimes I can’t help myself and I pray he will forgive me for my lack of trust.  I will continue with my training of Riley, she has gotten so big and I will post more pictures soon.

 

Morning Prayer

Lord you know my challenges that comes with every passing day

So as I  lift my hands to worship You, give me the courage to obey

Help me to remember Your promises and open my heart to You

Let others see You, through me today ,in everything I do

 

Take away the pain and bitterness that life sometimes brings

Help me to thank You always and help my heart to sing

As my voice shouts out Your praises, fill my soul with Your love

And help me avoid the pitfalls while You guide me from above

 

If I had just one thing to leave behind when You come to take me home

I want to leave the love of Christ, that lives on in every place I roamed

Because you sent me as Your messenger so all the world could see

Your love for all the people no matter where they are or where they flee

 

They will always be Your children whether near or far

Even if they are good or bad or they don’t know who they are

And as a loving Father he does not require that we fix

The brokeness inside us from the wounds that life inflicts

 

Instead He offers mercy and a second chance to live your life renewed

As he wipes away every tear and fills your heart with love so true

With tenderness and longing He calls us all to come and be his sheep

As the great Shepherd He invites us to discover his love is all we seek

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Not over the Mountain yet.

Sorry it’s been awhile since my last post but my health is once again not co-operating with my get well soon plan. My menstrual cycle seemed to stop almost two years ago and I thought I had finished with that time of my life but last month I began to bleed for about three weeks straight. After a few visits to the hospital to try to determine if the blood was from the bladder or kidneys they have decided that it is coming from my cervix. After stopping menstruation it is unusual to start to bleed again  so they took an ultrasound which revealed nothing and now they want to do a biopsy on my uterus wall. Cancer is a very scary word and I know they have to rule it out but it does leave oneself with a nervous feeling in the pit of one’s stomach.My blood tests are normal for a woman who is not premenaposal which leaves the doctor’s puzzled. I am trying to remain calm and optimistic but I have begun bleeding more heavily than I ever have  before and I am unsure as to what is the next step is in this procedure. My doctor has informed me that my B levels in my blood are low and I think that it is that symptom that makes me feel so tired out. I have been slacking on Riley’s training as menstrual cramps are making me feel quite horrible and I feel exhausted all the time. Still I know the Lord will help and give me the strength to keep going . Hopefully I will have more pictures and stories to tell you but right now I am just tired and hoping that things get easier later on. Mean while my service dog in training turned a year on July 14th. Where do the days go? Anyway here is  a picture of her around ten weeks.

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Thanks to the Lord My God For I can do all things through him who strengthens me Amen.

 

 

Onward Christian Soldier -With Service Dogs It’s Not All Easy Sailing

So far I have covered the fun parts of Service Dog ownership but it isn’t always easy-going. All through Riley’s training I have been enduring kidney stones that had torn up my tubes so scar tissue has started to block tubes in my kidney which cause the kidney to swell and become blocked. In February of this year I underwent surgery to correct this. They had to cut my tubes our and create new tubes by stretching up pieces of my bladder and re attach them to my kidney and bladder. I came home and was unable to work with Riley for a time.

While I was healing Riley had to be crated when I wandered down from my room for some exercise and my husband Jim was in charge of taking her for walks and caring for her until I had healed enough to start training again. ..

Now I can’t stress this enough if you have a service dog you should teach it crate training.

The reason I stress this is because if something happens and you are too sick to look after your dog or you have an operation you have already taught the dog that if it is not with you the crate is a safe spot so your dog can relax quietly while your on the mend. Service dogs that have not been crate trained can be destructive when their owners disappear to get medical procedures done because of the stress of being without its owner. This can happen even if you have someone else living and looking after the dog while you are sick.

The other reason crate training is important because we teach our dogs to open doors and open cupboards and the fridge in an effort to help us. While you are training and the pup/dog is learning these traits they don’t always know what the training is for. All the dog knows is this is a great game to play and the dog still wants to play it long after you want to stop. So take Riley for instance  her favorite game is fetch if she is on the lead she will happily pick up what ever you want and she will bring it back as long as she is on the leash. When she is loose and picks something up she will bring it to me and dash away in attempt to play her most favorite game fetch up and then chase. Untill Riley really understands the command fetch up means to give it to me and the game is over she will spend the whole day stealing things and getting into way more mischief than an ordinary dog trying  to get me to chase her.  In order to avoid this when I can’t be around to watch what she is doing I crate her so I know that she is not going to take something that might hurt her if I was not around to stop her.

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Riley managed to pull in the blanket Indy laid on. When Jim crated her before he went to work he did not think she could reach the blanket and pull it in with her. I was upstairs sleeping on pain killers and did not hear a thing. she also ripped up the plastic tray that she pushed out side of the crate. This was done out of boredom. She was used to going out with me everyday before the surgery as well as regular training exercises. After this Jim made sure he took her out for an hour of play before he left to tire her out. Imagine what my house would have looked like if she was not crated. Riley had also learned to open the door by pulling on a strap and she soon learned to let herself outside the door and into the cold porch to eat the cats food. As soon as we seen this her training on opening the door was phased out for a while.

Now if I was just training the family dog you would scold or discipline them in a way they understood that they should not pick up things up or not to open that door but this is where service dog training gets hard. I want Riley to pick up things up and in order for her to be effective in training she not only has to understand the game she has to love to want to play that game so if I started scolding her I could turn her off the game and she might refuse to pick up things. I could give her a harsh command and that would stop from going out the door but it would also stop her wanting to open the door when I commanded her to. So I use the crate as a control untill Riley really understands all the commands and teach what her boundaries are.

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Riley also has a gift for looking really guilty and sorrowful at the same time but I can assure you this all goes away the second I open the door and let her out.

Another part of training a service dog is always being in the public eye. somedays when Riley is being good and doing what she is told it feels great to have a service dogs. On days when you don’t feel so good and your service dog is not listening it can be very stressful.

When in a very crowed mall where children are running wild and left unattended and the aisles are full of people not watching were they are walking it sometimes feels like your navigating your dog through a mine field. You have to constantly watch your dog to make sure they are healing and unstressed, you somehow have to keep looking ahead to see what is coming and be aware of the cart you have behind you in case they are not watching where they are going .Sometimes it can be a great day and others you just can’t wait to be out of the store as fast as possible.

I know people for the most part are fascinating with Service dogs and they don’t mean to cause you trouble when they croon her puppy puppy. Or when they barge up and start petting your dog even though you have please don’t pet all over her harness. I am always polite and I always make the effort to explain that just talking to a medic alert dog could distract him from his owner long enough to miss a signal that a epileptic seizure is going to occur and that person could be hurt. I don’t believe the majority of the people do it on purpose they just don’t realize the outcome of their actions can prove detrimental to a person with seizures.

The kind of people who drive me the most crazy are the ones that watch you and they have just seen you put the dog on a down stay and they wander over and stand right in front of the dog and try to make the dog break his stay. Suddenly their hands will become cold and they will feel the need to clap them . Or they  suddenly discover while standing in front of your dog that there leg has gone to sleep and they feel the need to stamp their foot alot lol.

But I think the actual worse person to run into is the kind of person who thinks they know it all and has a service dog of their own and they just decide that it becomes their job to police your service dog and you must prove to them that you are legit and not fake. They are usually very loud and overbearing people who will demand to see your id and scream the halls down because they just love a scene. After that they will follow you all over the store trying to make your dog break by letting their dog run up the back of you or dropping items to scare the dog.  Please know this is harassment it is not your job to convince the public that you have a legitimate service dog. If you have shown the management your paperwork than you do not have to produce it to anyone else that asks. If the person starts following you around the store I would go to management and ask management to ask them to leave because they are harassing you in a public place. These people actually post on the service board that they did these things and they feel proud of harassing an individual. I actually love it when they post it on-line and are kind enough to mention the store and where it is so people can avoid them in the future.

If you suffer from anxiety training a service dog can be a daunting task but not impossible, because you are dealing with the general public who forget to be kind sometimes. If you start to feel anxious stop with your dog and do deep pressure therapy if that doesn’t help I would just call it a day and go home and give it a try some other time. If your anxiety does often overwhelm you in pubic than a dog that is already trained as a service dog might be the way to go.017

Riley riding in the back of the truck on our way to Walmart.

You will find there are days when you think you just dont have enough energy to deal with shopping and taking the dog but I always push myself  past these days. Alot of times it is just anxiety talking and I go on to have a much better day because she was there001.JPG

Being a Christian on the day that I go out it doesn’t hurt to say a prayer before we go its a way of inviting the Lord into your day. Actually I had involved the Lord to help me pick Riley out of the litter. I figured there was no one more qualified than the Lord to help me pick a pup since he made her mother and all creation was his in the beginning. And even with all the up and downs in our journey I still think she is the best dog for me.

 

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